More Commonly Asked Questions About Children and Grief
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4. How can we protect children from the loss?
It is impossible to protect children from the pain of losing someone they loved. Trying to hide the death from them will only delay their inevitable realization
that the person is no longer a part of the child’s life. It is better to include children in the mourning experience and teach them a healthy way to deal with their
feelings.
5. Should children see their parents and/or family grieving?
Yes. Children learn how to express their own feelings by example. If a child is able to witness important adults in their life openly grieving, then they too will
be able to express their feelings of loss. Sharing how they feel is often an essential part of the healing process.
6. How can adults help a grieving child?
Adults need to provide a supportive, caring environment in which children are allowed to openly express their feelings. This includes hugging the child,
listening to them talk about their feelings, letting them know it’s ok to cry, and that they will not feel such deep sadness forever.
Some children may want to be more creative in how they express their emotions. Writing a letter to the deceased, drawing a picture, or composing a song
are all excellent ways to release grief and pain. These projects also can be included in the ceremony, giving the child a meaningful way to say goodbye.
7. Can loss permanently scar a child?
Often children are more resilient then we think they will be. With support, love and comfort from you and the other important adults in their lives, children
adjust and learn to live with loss.
Copyright © 2008 National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA)